Alaska’s Possession Is Our Obsession

Akaska sacred faous gropScared Famous – Season One, Episode Five, Insane Drown Posse

New York and Drita are facing off in the elimination challenge. The two have to be tethered to the wall by leather leashes, and need to find four keys.  After that, they need to grab the main key and win.  New York says being tied down is nothing new for her.  There is a baby alligator chained up in the room, and somehow both women are afraid of this poor animal.
I love Drita’s commentary, she doesn’t like wearing bondage wear, and the dirty toilets a la Saw disgust her.  New York finds two keys, but the baby alligator comes her way.  She screams at it that she respects “you and your people”.  I wish neither of these women had to leave this show until the very end.  New York, why couldn’t you have chosen someone else for this challenge?

New York walks in the door!  Erica is excited because one more person is out of the house. New York tells the others that she sees herself as a threat now.  Safaree says the ghosts did not want her to leave. Safaree, please stop the bad acting.

Everyone goes to the graveyard, and gets drunk like teenagers.  The mourners leave cooking utensils, pasta sauce, and something for shade at Drita’s grave.
Alaska brings a bundle of sticks with a blonde hair, to Team Model. She says she found in front of their door.  Alaska goes to confront New York, who she is certain placed it by the door.  New York turns it on her, like Alaska is doing some “black magic”.

Alaska seems to be sick.  She stumbles into her bed, looking pale and sweaty, saying she doesn’t think she can do the challenge that night. Eva says she doesn’t know if Alaska is trying to top New York on the “crazy”, but she will be happy to sit and watch.

Ghost hologram Drita reminds everyone to vote New York off, but New York reminds everyone she has immunity.  Alaska starts violently coughing. Safaree says she looks “sicker than a poltergeist’s daughter”.  New York says it because of the “devil sticks”, and that Alaska has been possessed by a demon.  Alaska starts to convulse and hiss at the roommates, who all pretend to freak out.  YES! Thank you VH1, if you are going to do this, at least have Alaska pretend to be possessed!  Safaree holds a cross over her, Alaska convulses some more, and the spirit leaves her. This is actually fun to watch.

Bad news everyone! New York has been kidnapped, and they need to find her for the challenge.  Alaska is so sick she can barely walk.  Redman introduces the challenge. They have to go through a funhouse maze, find Tiffany, take off her blindfold, and get her out in five minutes.  Whoever finds New York and takes off her blindfold,  will get a special reward for later. Sky hates clowns, and is having issues,  There is a llama for some reason?  It starts spitting on the group. Why are they doing this to a llama? Sky finds New York, and takes off her blindfold!  Alaska keeps looking worse, with added red liner under her eyes for effect,  Redman seems concerned.
Sky’s reward will be to pick whoever she wants to be in the elimination challenge.  Erica is scared because her alliance plans don’t seem to be working out.

Everyone is happy back at the house, and some are covered in llama spit.  New York reminds Sky that she has a lot of power. Some clowns show up outside the house, and everyone freaks out!  The door is unlocked, and everyone scrambles to lock all the doors.  The clown gets in the house!  Sky runs outside.  Erica pretends to be terrified, and hides in her bedroom with Safaree.  Don is just trying to take a shower while all of this nonsense is going on.

We don’t know what happened to the clown, but the next morning, Alaska looks like the walking dead.  Sky walks into the room, and asks everyone why she shouldn’t pick them for elimination. Safaree claims no one in the house has been more honest with Sky than him.  Sky laughs at that one.  Erica tells Sky to pick her, because she needs the practice to take everyone out one by one.
Sky picks Erica and Safaree.  She tells Safaree she has been trying to get him out of the house from day one, and Erica is going to be the one to send him home.  Safaree stomps off, and says he won’t do it because Erica is the woman who might carry his child one day.  Erica tells Safaree to not let anything personal get in the way during the challenge, Safaree pretends like he cares about Erica.  All of a sudden a pitcher of water starts “floating” in the air by itself! Freak out time!

Night falls, and there are more creepy clowns outside the house!  Is that clown from last night still somewhere in the house?  Oh no! The clown is Alaska, who tells everyone she’s “not clownin around motherfuckers”, followed by a demonic laugh.  She collapses to the ground, and wakes up, claiming not to remember anything that happened. Can we just give some love to Alaska for bringing some truly over-the-top goodness to this silly reality show?

It’s time for the challenge, and Safaree and Erica leave for the challenge.  Alaska is looking pale and sick again.
For this challenge, Safaree and Erica will each be placed in a tank filling with water.  There are plugs on the bottom of the tanks, and they have to find the right ones for the right pipes.  The challengers get in their tanks. See?  It’s not so hard to properly end an episode, instead of an awkward editing job.

What did we learn this week-  Safaree acting, not fun. Alaska acting, fun.  The show won’t be as fun without Drita, but that’s how competition shows go.

Alaska’s Look of the Week: alaska scared f 5

Also, Alaskaclownsf

-Aoife, TV Guru


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