The Real Housewives of Potomac – Season 3, Episode 6, I Came From Jesus
Karen is feeling alone, because Raven is back at school. She wishes she could talk to Ray about his tax issues, but he does not want to discuss things with her in order to protect her. They talk about Raven leaving back to school. Karen mentions she wants to add a fragrance line to her hair line. Karen tells us she likes to work, and has always worked. We are treated to a photo of adorable, seventeen year old Karen working at Taco Bell in a uniform, that looks better than any fast food uniform around today. Ray tells Karen she will always have his support in her business ventures.
Ashley, Charisse, Candiace, and Monique go to a spa for a cryogenic body treatment! Joy! Candiace hopes the women have gotten their hazing out of the way.
One by one, they all go to get frozen, in order of height. Charisse works it in the chamber, she could have done a photo shoot. Everyone else looks cold and miserable. They go to a message room, where they are put in leg massage machines, just like the kind patients use to improve circulation. I do not think any of these women are in need of a compression massage, so it must be another way this spa gets away with getting people to part with their money.
Candiace talks about how some of the women were treating her at the bubble soccer event. Charisse teases Candiace, and asks if her mother paid for her engagement ring. Everyone laughs, but Candiace does not seem to appreciate it.
The focus turns to Ashley and Michael, but instead, Ashley says she has planned a woodland retreat for all the women, and everyone is excited. Charisse, please come back to the show!
Michael and Ashley go for a bike ride through the woods. They stop to rest by a stream, and talk about what happened at bubble soccer. Ashley mentions that she talked to Karen about the issues with her mom, and that she agreed with Michael. Ashley tells Michael they have to help her mother for the next few months to give her a chance to plan. She understands that he does not want to support her mother’s boyfriend, and neither does she.
Ashley says she was raised in a black community, where families take care of each other, and help out each other. Michael’s family does not help each other in the way that a lot of families support each other. Michael once again tells Ashley she has to cut her mother off.
Ashley asks what is the point of them continuing their relationship, since she cannot cut off her mom. Ashley tells us she does not know what to do about her marriage, or her mother.
Robyn packs up for the retreat, and Juan surprises her with some new hiking shoes. One of their young sons insists that action deserves a kiss, and Robyn and Juan have a little smooch.
Monique, Ashley, and Candiace go shopping “for the trip”. Candiace is excited for the retreat, but is a little cautious. She hopes the ladies can really get to know her.
Monique says she found out there are two master suites. Monique asks who is getting the suites. Ashley tells Monique, maybe she and Gizelle should share the space, to work things out. Ashley tells Candiace that she hope she and Charisse can work things out. Candiace says she was angered by Charisse’s comment about her engagement ring. This worries Monique, who loves Charisse, and likes Candiace a lot. She hopes they can get to know each other, and get along.
Monique was in a car accident! She is relatively alright, but hurt her back. The car is damaged, but the important thing is that she is alive! Chris helps her with her back with a back roller.
He sees her off on the Retreat Drama Bus.
One by one, almost everyone boards this party bus, and then they wait for Robyn. Monique tells the group about her accident. Robyn shows up, and they hit the road.
Gizelle asks Ashley what they will be doing at the retreat, and Ashley says they will do fly-fishing, zip-lining, and other activities. Ashley talks about how her grandparents used to take her to the country in the summer, to do outdoor activities, and they stayed in a trailer. Gizelle grills Ashley, and makes fun of her for having livws in a trailer.
Monique is not pleased, and wishes Gizelle would get over how many houses everyone owns. For some reason, Monique brings up the Charisse “shady bitch moment”, when Charisse asked Candiace if her mom bought her ring. Charisse is not hearing it, because she thought it was teasing, and does not appreciate that Candiace called her a bitch. Ruh roh.
Candiace says Charisse made a shady bitch comment, and she did not call her a bitch. Gizelle jumps in and starts yelling at Candiace. Monique sits between Candiace and Charisse as they insult each other. Everyone wants to break out the popcorn, except for Monique, who really needs to relax on this trip.
Ashley diffuses the situation and reminds everyone they are stuck on a bus together, and to have a good time.
Monique drinks most of a bottle of wine, which concerns Gizelle, who thinks Monique needs a wine time-out.
The women arrive at the retreat, which is really a luxury resort, and all the ladies are pleased. The women are driven to their destination in two separate Rolls Royce Phantoms. Ashley knows what these women want when it comes to travel accommodations.
In the car with Karen, Charisse, and Gizelle, the consensus is Candiace needs to apologize. In the other car, Candiace says people need to not treat her like she is a little girl.
Ashley has to pull off to the side of the road, to pee in the bushes.
The women arrive at the dining area, and sit down to lunch. Gizelle tells Candiace that she owes Charisse an apology.
Candiace tells Charisse should apologize to her. Charisse says she made that comment in jest, and that she should have brought it up when it happened. Ashley jumps in and acknowledges it was a shady comment. Candiace tells Gizelle and Charisse that it is not their business that her mother takes care of her, and calls them kept women. Karen tells Candiace that she was sharing too much information with the ladies, so it is her fault? What, Karen? Gizelle asks where Candiace came from, and Candiace answers, “I came from Jesus”. Gizelle keeps poking at Candiace, and telling her to apologize to Charisse. Ashley wishes Gizelle would stop. Gizelle and Candiace yell at each other more, with Gizelle telling Candiace to “Shut the fuck up”. Ashley, who is sitting in between the two women tries to break it up, and again reminds the group they are all going to be stuck with each other for the next few days. This is going to be a fun trip for all!
What did we learn this week- Gizelle needs to stop the classist nonsense. She has been doing this for three seasons, and I assume, her entire life. Also, it is not against Gizelle’s sense of host/guest etiquette that a guest would not make fun of the host staying in a trailer at some point in her life?
Again, I feel really bad for Ashley, and the choice she is being forced to make.
-Aoife, TV Guru