The Real Housewives of Potomac – Season 3, Episode 18, Unsolved Mystery
What a season it has been. So many amazing reads. So many gems that fell from the mouths of the Housewives of Potomac/Great Falls. A press conference, a pizza delivery, a scam psychic, so much! Let us end season three!Back at Karen’s house, the pizza mission is still in full force. Wolverine Ashley, and sad wig Gizelle hide in the bushes, as a bearded, bespectacled Robyn rings the door thrice. Robyn tells us maybe since Karen is not expecting anyone that no one answered the door, or maybe she is not home.
Robyn takes that damned beard off, and says she is getting a hairball. Robyn says she saw a purse in the kitchen, and Gizelle says that might mean she is home. Ashley thinks it is odd that no one would answer the door, just to see who was ringing the bell.
The women stay in the car for a few more minutes, then call off the pizza stakeout.
Ashley has an appointment with her therapist. She repeats that Michael said he is hesitant to have children with her, because he is afraid she will be the same kind of parent as her mother. She tells her therapist that Michael never said anything like this to her before that day. Ashley tells us that Michael was always saying it was the wrong time to have children, and is now questioning her morals and ethical judgement.
Ashley’s therapist asks her how it felt that Michael was saying she would be a bad mom. Ashley says she was really upset at first, because she felt like he was attacking her mom. She says Michael did not have a right to say that, because he was not there during her upbringing, and did not experience the things they had to go through. Ashley says it was a really low blow, which it was. Ashley’s therapist tells her it sounds like Michael does not want to have children with Ashley. Her therapist asks her if she wants to be with someone who does not think she would not make a good parent. She tells Ashley there cannot be compromise on this issue, and that she and Michael really need to talk about it.
Candiace and Chris are going to have an engagement party hosted by Candiace’s mom. She asks Chris to look over the invitation. Chris says he is excited.
He tells Candiace he talked to his children’s mother, and she agreed to let them be involved in the wedding. Chris has not talked to his son in ten years, and says he will write him a letter.
Candiace tells Chris to tell his son how Chris felt, and the mistakes he has made.
Candiace gives Chris a big hug, and she gets teary. She tells Chris she is sure his son will want to get to know him.
Ashley and Michael have some coffee at home. Ashley says when she came back from France, things were good with her and Michael. Ashley talks about the trip, and that Karen came for Ashley, Michael, and their marriage.
They discuss the great mystery of where Karen lives.
Ashley tells Michael she is asking for the possibility of having a baby, and they have a disconnect. Michael says he has not weighed the pros and cons. Ashley says having children was part of the deal with their marriage. Michael gives a lot of vague answers, saying he needs time going between planning his future without Ashley, and them getting back together and working things out. Ashley says if they do not have children by the time she is thirty, she will be done. Do not waste your twenties being with someone who does not care about you!
Karen and Ray sit for dinner at the Great Falls house. Karen tells Ray the France trip was full of the usual cat fights, and they visited some lovely “fragrance places”.
Ray tells Karen he has been mostly down, with the lawyers trying to fix the financial situation are in. Ray says he worked something out with the government, but he cannot give Karen any details. Karen tells us she is thrilled to hear that Ray is in a good place with this situation.
She says adversity teaches you who you are. You know, the adversity of tax evasion, and getting caught because you owe millions of dollars to the government.
Robyn’s oldest son has a birthday party, and the special guest is Juan’s biological father , Bruce. They tell him about medium “Psychic Justin”, and all of the details she told them.
Robyn says it feels like they have all known each other for a very long time.
Then, all the kids race around a track.
They talk about Psychic Justin some more. Why? At least he brought the family together with information they could have found out themselves.
Candiace is getting ready for her and Chris’s engagement party. She is very happy to see her stepfather, Ronnie, as she hope he will help keep a nice amount of space between her and her mother.
Candiace asks Ronnie what it was like becoming a stepparent. Ronnie gives Candiace a look, and Candiace says it must have been hard dealing with younger children.
It i time for the engagement party! Candiace is happy to see all of her family and friends. Ashley brings the gift of a bonzai tree, and Candiace says she will think of nurturing her relationship with Chris when she takes care of the plant.
Gizelle and Robyn arrive, with thoughts of the Karen-related pizza delivery mystery dancing in their heads.
Chris gives a toast, and tells the women that bubble soccer was a nice way to get know everyone, but apologizes that there were no napkins. He hands out a personalized, embroidered napkin to each of the ladies. He thanks them all for coming to their event.
Gizelle thinks this gesture might mean Chris is a good husband for Candiace after all, “brown penis and everything”.
Ashley decides this is a good time to ask Karen, “What’s the deal”. Karen ignores her. Ashley asks if she is ignoring her. Karen tells her of course she is.
Ashley asks why. Ashley then says it is nice to see her wearing her ring, and that Ray is at the event. Candiace tells Ashley that was not a compliment. Ashley says she is genuinely happy about that Karen is wearing her wedding ring. Karen laughs, and tells Candiace to not worry about it. Karen tells Ashley that she is just trying to seek attention right now, because Karen is not giving it to her. She tells Ashley to keep her name out of Ashley’s mouth. Ashley tells Karen to just tell the truth. Karen tells Ashley she is the biggest liar in the group, and that she lies about everything. Karen tells Ashley the day she cares that Ashley cares about her ring, her toesnails, her toes, her teeth, she will check herself into an “insane asylum”. Karen again tells Ashley she is a liar, and she gives nothing but lies. Ashley tells Karen she is not answering a lot of questions.
Monique asks how they will resolve this.
Karen tells Ashley to stay out of her business, do not talk about her rings, or her family. She tells Ashley that she and Ray are solid. Ashley asks Karen if they are.
The party is going, everyone is eating and having fun. Ray introduces himself to Candiace’s Aunt Tammy. Michael decides this is the perfect time to make himself look like a total jerk.
Michael asks Ray in front of Candiace’s relatives where he is living at the moment. Ray makes a face at the women, acknowledging that Michael is acting like a jerk.
Michael asks Ray if he is living in Potomac, or Great Falls. Ray tells Michael he has been to his house. We all feel really bad for Aunt Tammy, and Candiace’s other relative who are have to witness this.
Michael tells Ray he has been to the Great Falls house, and asks him is it a rental house, and Ray says that is his house. Michael asks Ray if he bought that house. Ray does not answer him, and Michael says it just does not make sense to him. Ray asks Michael “what the fuck are you talking about”.
Michael leaves Ray, and does up to where all the women are sitting. He tells Karen he just had a weird interaction with Ray, and that Ray was being kind of disrespectful. Michael, are you kidding us?
Michael continues, and tells Karen that he was wondering why Ray moved when he lived ten minutes away from work. Karen asks him what was Ray’s answer.
Michael says Ray said it was none of his business. Karen smiles, and tells Michael Ray was telling him the truth.
Michael says he was just trying to help Ray, Gizelle metion that Michael is a real estate man, and Karen informs Michael he is not Ray’s business partner, and says “I’m sure Ray checked your ass”.
Karen, if only Ray had your skills!
Michael throws up his hands, and apologizes. What?
Karen tells us in confessional that Michael knows where she and Ray live, but are not invited. She asks us who does this? The answer of course is people like Michael.
Karen says she can see why Ashley and Michael married each other, they are cut from the same moldy, mildewy, messy cloth.
Gizelle takes this moment to ask Karen if she had a pizza delivered to her house the other night.
Karen says she does not know, and what is going on. Gizelle says everyone got pizza deliveries the other night. Karen unecessarily applies an extra layer of lipgloss, and is silent. Gizelle asks Karen if she saw a pizza box in front of her door, and there is a vague answer.
Gizelle tells us “the plot thickens”, and the season ends. Pizza.
What did we learn this week- I could honestly care less if Karen lives in a big house, or a fancy townhouse. However, something has clearly been going on with Karen. At the reunion we will probably find out what is happening, because that is how reunions work.
Most of this episode was about how Michael is a jerk, or featuring him in action.
Editing can make someone look awful, but I wonder, after three seasons, is it editing, or is Michael terrible, and a bad husband to Ashley.
-Aoife, TV Maven