I Understand You have Elephantiasis but Do Your Job

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 5 – Naked Smoothies

Episode 5 of this season begins with the morning after hangovers.  The crew went out and celebrated a sweeeet tip and now the place is a mess.  Caroline says it’s a mind fuck to work with people who are nice to your face but mean behind your back.  She speaks the truth there.  Caroline needs to look less for people’s approval yet hearing Josiah shit talk her wasn’t cool.

Kate does not remember what she said and seriously wants to know!  Who can remember??? Oh yes everyone because it’s on film.  Kate you only talked shit on Rhylee- Josiah said he wanted to fire Caroline.  But he doesn’t remember anything either.  What a fucking banger they had!

Caroline gets an infected foot. The new charter guest are from new money- aka they like to take pictures of themselves looking hott and rich.  Sounds lame.  Bravo has a scandalous take of a shirtless Captain Lee chillin’ in the crow’s nest.  Ooo La La.  Chandler calls a morning deck meeting that has no facts or tasks assigned.

The theme of this charter is boring guests obsessed with voyeuring their naked bodies to Kate Chastain and voyeuring their souls to Instagram finger clicks. Captain Lee rages at Chandler for changing the radio channel.  Safety is his number one priority.  I also think Captain Lee loses respect for Chandler with his poor leadership skills when dealing with Rhylee.  Alas, this is Chandler’s second safety offense.  One too many in my book 😉  Chandler is so monotone I fall asleep at the sound of his voice but then he says “I’m knockin’ off” and I feel rage build within my sleepy body.  I’ve never disliked a bosun so much.

New money breathalyzer king leaves his used condom on the nightstand for Caroline to clean up.  Holy sweet Jesus Mother of Mary what the Christ?!?!?!  They request fishing and Chandler doesn’t have Rhylee (who is a professional Alaskan fisherperson) go on the excursion.  How sad!  Chandler you are a terrible leader.

Till next week!


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