Where is Grendel When You Need Him?

housewives of dallas season 3 episode 13 leeanne group fightThe Real Housewives of Dallas – Season 3, Episode 13, Something is Rotten in Denmark

Oh Joy!  The Dallas Housewives are going on a trip where there will be nothing but fighting, and more fighting.  We just survived three awful episodes of RHOC, where their Jamaica trip was also mostly bitter fighting, which was exhausting, and painful to watch.
Will there be anything fun happening on this trip to Copenhagen?  Let us see!The women arrive in Denmark!  Stephanie says she still does not know where Copenhagen is, and she hopes people speak English.
Some of the ladies drink on the bus, after their long, exhausting flight.
Cary tells the group the itinerary, which includes dinner that night, and a music premiere party the next day.  Kameron announces she will be wearing a leather jacket, and everyone ooohs and ahhhs.  Cary tells Kameron she wants her to dress like a rapper, and Kameron attempts to speak how she thinks rappers speak.  Cary tries to give her some tips.  Horrific. Why did this make the cut?

The group arrives at the hotel with more drinks.  As they get ready for dinner, D’Andra talks to Cary about the alcoholic comments made about her.  D’Andra says people have been talking about Beaver Creek, which means someone in the group has been talking.  She thinks Kameron may be talking to people about the trip.
Stephanie says Brandi has a horrible idea.  Ruh roh.
Brandi will be drinking too much at dinner to see if LeeAnne will call her an alcoholic.  Brandi says she just wants to have fun, and make LeeAnne feel uncomfortable.  Stephanie thinks Brandi should just confront LeeAnne, and let her know she is aware of what she has been saying about Brandi.

It is dinner time, and Brandi asks what are sweetbreads, and is not pleased with the answer.  Stephanie says that a lot of food on this menu is pretentious and is not real food.  Kameron says she wishes there was “American” food, with French fries.  You are all in another country.  No one is making you eat a thymus gland, find something else on the menu!
However, according to Cary, the scallops are phenomenal, and very fresh.
Brandi tells us about her brilliant alcoholic plan.
Everyone does shots of Danish liquor, which makes everyone cough.  Brandi drinks three shots, and LeeAnne makes faces. housewives of dallas season 3 episode 13 Brandi leeanne
LeeAnne says Brandi is proving her point, which is that she is a drunk.  Brandi takes everyone’s drinks, and makes a pyramid.
Stephanie thinks this is going too far, and Brandi is hurting herself.

LeeAnne talks about her wedding plans, and D’Andra claims that LeeAnne did not tell her about the dress fitting until the night before.
Kameron asks what is going on between her and LeeAnne.  D’Andra gets extremely defensive, and tells Kameron to shut up. D’Andra tells Kameron she has not been a good friend to her lately, and she needs to stay out of something that is not her business.  Kameron tells her to look at her behavior, and asks her if this is how Mama Dee talks to her. Not surprisingly, this sets D’Andra off.
D’Andra tells Kameron she is done putting up with everyone’s crap.  Kameron asks what she has done to her, and that D’Andra attacked her and her mother in law.
Cary tells the group this is not good, but Kameron and D’Andra keep digging at each other. housewives of dallas season 3 episode 13 Dandra
Kameron gets up to leave, sarcastically telling D’Andra what a great friend she is.
Cary pays the bill.
Brandi laments that Kameron and Cary have ruined her plans with LeeAnne, and now she is just really drunk.
Kameron and D’Andra see each other at the elevators.  Kameron tells D’Andra she is absolutely disgusting, and they start yelling again.  Will someone please separate these two!  The other women have to put D’Andra in the elevator, and make sure the door is closed, so she leaves the area.
Kameron cries, and the other women try to comfort her. Stephanie thinks D’Andra is lashing out because she is under so much pressure from Dallas society.
Everyone gathers upstairs.  LeeAnne tells D’Andra she can say her piece without getting loud.  D’Andra tells LeeAnne she has only been the new LeeAnne for six months.  LeeAnne tells D’Andra she always has to be right, but she is not right when it comes to this.

Kameron is in her suite, being comforted by Brandi, Stephanie, and Cary,  LeeAnne comes back in, saying D’Andra always has to be right.  Kameron tells us D’Andra has been poking at LeeAnne and D’Andra had better watch out because LeeAnne is going to come back at her.
D’Andra tells at Kameron for telling Jimmy everything that happened at Beaver Creek.  Kameron says her mother in law is her best friend, and she tells her everything.  Everyone tells D’Andra people talk, and she has to understand this.
LeeAnne gets up to yell, and Cary has to hold her arm down to keep her from hitting D’Andra.
housewives of dallas season 3 episode 12 group
Kameron asks D’Andra to leave their room.
LeeAnne calmly announces she is exhausted, and is going to bed.  Stephanie asks her what is wrong, and LeeAnne says she is exhausted of D’Andra always being right, and everyone else being wrong. She says her weave, and the her pantyliner on her underwear are also exhausted, and she does not want to not be around this. This is one of the most incredible LeeAnne speeches we have ever heard.  Someone please make some plaques and hoop art of this now!
Brandi is still trying to comfort Kameron, and  Brandi asks LeeAnne why she is going off on her best friend. LeeAnne checks Brandi, telling her what a good friend she has been to D’Andra, and she is not returning the favor.  Brandi, do not even try to start anything right now.

The next morning, Brandi has a bad hangover, and Stephanie says she keeps throwing up fish.  Her plan to mess with LeeAnne was a complete failure.  This is what happens when you can’t act like a human being about things, and decide to play games.
Kameron and LeeAnne talk about the night before, and Kameron says D’Andra is the one who should be in anger management.
The activities for the day are cooking, and going to a brewery,  D’Andra says she wants to relax and cook, and LeeAnne wants to do whatever D’Andra is not doing.

Brandi and Stephanie get to the brewery first.  Brandi says after a hard night of drinking, she could use some hair of the dog.  Kameron and LeeAnne arrive afterward.  LeeAnne says she has chosen beer, which she cannot stand, over D’Andra.
Brandi tells Kameron she hopes she and D’Andra can work things out.  Kameron wonders what there is to work out when her supposed friend yells at her when Kameron  says anything.
LeeAnne tells Stephanie she was going to hit D’Andra last night, and Cary stopped her.  LeeAnne starts to cry, talking about how hard she works. She tells us she is going to cut D’Andra out of her life, and focus on the important things.  Stephanie says LeeAnne handled everything beautifully, but Brandi does not agree, just to be a jerk.  Brandi, you are coming out worse than D’Andra right now, and are being spiteful.
At cooking class, D’Andra tells Cary she cannot work things out with Kameron or LeeAnne, because they both keep butting in to one on one conversations with the other.

It is time for the release party with Cary’s family.  Cary is nervous, but excited to see family she has not seen in years.  Cary’s cousin Camilla is putting out an album, and she performs.  She is a popular artist, and when she sings, we hear why.  Seriously, check out Camilla’s music, and the song she played on this episode.
The group feels out of their element, except for Kameron, who says she can hang because she went to art school.
Cary says she feels good being surrounded by her family, and she loves the connection she has with Camilla.

Back at the hotel, the women relax with drinks.
Brandi finally confronts LeeAnne, saying Mama Dee told her that LeeAnne called her an alcoholic.  LeeAnne denies using that word.  Cary tells LeeAnne she called Brandi an alcoholic in her presence, but Kameron denies that.  We are shown video receipts of LeeAnne using the word alcoholic in Kameron’s presence. Cary does not like that LeeAnne is not owning up to what she said, and Kameron is covering for her.
Brandi cries and tells LeeAnne that rumors like that can hurt her with the adoption.  LeeAnne tells us this is ridiculous because she is not calling the adoption “people”.
LeeAnne apologizes to Brandi.
Brandi continues crying, saying LeeAnne calling her an alcoholic triggers her, making her think about a rough time in her marriage where she was drinking a bottle of wine every night.  Everyone comforts Brandi.   LeeAnne makes faces in her chair. Perhaps this was Brandi’s issue with being called an alcoholic, and not so much the adoption fears?
Either way, it is good Brandi got this out, and told the group.  You get things done when you are direct with people, and not by playing games with them.

What did we learn this week –   Brandi seems to be stuck in junior high, and has a hard time acting like an adult.   Her alcoholic plan is just an example of this, as is trying to hurt LeeAnne as much as possible over the course of the first two days in Denmark.
When Brandi wants to do something fun, it’s one thing.  This kind of spiteful behavior is quite another.

LeeAnne’s I am Exhausted speech needs to be quoted for the ages.  That was the only good thing to come out of this nasty fighting.  I just wrote two recaps, am in extreme pain, and if I had a weave and was wearing a pantyliner, they would also be exhausted.
The next time you are drained, just repeat LeeAnne’s speech to whoever is in the room.

-Aoife, TV Maven

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