Jamie, Why?

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 8 – Flesh Wounds Are Not Five Star

Captain Lee is laying down the law about them getting their heads out of their asses.  Ashton and Ross tell Chandler that he isn’t informing them of the game plan.  He doesn’t understand that it’s his job to create and convey that plan.  DUH.  Rhylee stays quiet which is so smart.  If she said what Ashton said I think Chandler might waterboard her. Oh Jamie why are you dating a monotone dummy? Even his washboard ab selfies make me yawn and yearn for a higher IQ.

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I’m Gonna Eat Somebody’s Ass for Dinner

 

Below Deck season 6 episode 2 drama brewingBelow Deck – Season 6 Episode 7 – New Kids on the Dock

The crew flips the boat for the next charter of 10 people – 2 of which are children.  Kate and Josiah refer to the 4 year old as “Master Pearson” which is hilarious.  It’s the first episode where we see Adrian put under pressure cooking for 8 adults and 2 kids who truthfully shouldn’t be on a fucking yacht.  I’m not judging but kids would rather be on the beach or a playground than a huge prison floating on water.  The guests did not like their gross Mahi Mahi and bland yet tough steaks.  Ouch.

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Not One Swinging Dick On Board

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 6 – Get Better or Go Home

This episode begins with Ashton and Chandler making fools of themselves pretending they can fish.  Well not Ashton; he is completely honest and never admits to knowing anything about fishing.  He is about the working out and partying but fishing? Not so much. The main charter guest shows off her butt cheeks and her man calls her a dime in a creepy way but I think it works for them.  Spoiler alert – they like to fuck on camera.

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I Understand You have Elephantiasis but Do Your Job

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 5 – Naked Smoothies

Episode 5 of this season begins with the morning after hangovers.  The crew went out and celebrated a sweeeet tip and now the place is a mess.  Caroline says it’s a mind fuck to work with people who are nice to your face but mean behind your back.  She speaks the truth there.  Caroline needs to look less for people’s approval yet hearing Josiah shit talk her wasn’t cool.

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Bring on the Polynesian Picnic

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 4 – Bitch in Charge

This episode begins with Ross losing his cool on Rhylee and going straight to Captain Lee.  That woman knows how to push people’s buttons!  Running to Captain Lee should be a last ditch effort before you strip naked and dive off the side of the boat ala Rocky stylee.  But Captain Lee seems to like Ross and understands his frustrations.  I thought it was a rash move.

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Yummy Veal

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 3 – I’m Also A Boat Captain!

This episode begins with the Rhylee/Chandler fight finishing up.  He’s just not that into you, girl.  Ok, more like he really dislikes the sound of your voice so you shouldn’t talk to him for a hott minute.  You think he’s a prick – so let’s all chill and hate together.  Kate then shuts the whole situation down because who else can?

Caroline worries about her mom with early on set dementia.  Adrian misses his girlfriend’s flesh.  The crew crushed the boat flip and welcome the 2nd charter guests on board.

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Foam and Fights

Below Deck season 6 episode 2 drama brewing

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 2 – Foam, Party of One

This episode begins with the Foam Man audaciously gunning a jet ski at 70 MPH without a life jacket.  Then he complains that driving a jet ski alone is boring.  I guess it’s more fun when you have someone else knocking at death’s door with you.  They might not want to die; he is bored by death.  Deck crew – minus one for allowing Bravo to film a man’s self destruction so easily.   It’s your JOB to keep people alive at sea.  Get his ass in a life jacket.

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Team Tahiti

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 1 – We’re Not In The Caribbean Anymore

Reality Recappers! Below Deck is back!!!  I’m ready for an epic Captain Lee and Kate Chastain season!

This season starts off with the crew meeting in gloomy weather in Tahiti.  There is Josiah, a Steward from England, who is a straight up qualified mixologist butler and Caroline, from Ohio, who sorta knows how to mix a drink.

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