Hatchet Party sans Danielle and Teresa: Actual Fun Times

housewives of jersey season 9 episode 2 melissa hatchetThe Real Housewives of New Jersey-  Season 9, Episode 2, Easter Wives Hunt

Margaret and Joe arrive at at a tattoo parlor.  Joe is getting a tattoo on his ring finger in lieu of a wedding ring, with their anniversary date.
Margaret mentions she is going away in two weeks.  She will be going to a children’s hospital to give out gowns she had made that look like costumes, and are more fun.   Thank you Margaret! Continue reading


Not One Swinging Dick On Board

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 6 – Get Better or Go Home

This episode begins with Ashton and Chandler making fools of themselves pretending they can fish.  Well not Ashton; he is completely honest and never admits to knowing anything about fishing.  He is about the working out and partying but fishing? Not so much. The main charter guest shows off her butt cheeks and her man calls her a dime in a creepy way but I think it works for them.  Spoiler alert – they like to fuck on camera.

Continue reading

MJ and Tommy’s Wedding, Featuring Vida, Momthra of the Bride

shahs of sunset season 7 mj tommy bridal tableShahs of Sunset – Season 7, Episode 13, A Very MJ Wedding

MJ continues to swim in her pool. She has asked Tommy’s best man to make sure Tommy is not black out drunk, but we know that is not happening.  MJ tells us there is nothing she can do if Tommy gets extremely drunk at their wedding, but hopes it will not happen.  MJ, you know your about to be husband better than that.  MJ, hopefully Tommy will not call you a Sexy Dorito on your wedding day. Continue reading

Where is Grendel When You Need Him?

housewives of dallas season 3 episode 13 leeanne group fightThe Real Housewives of Dallas – Season 3, Episode 13, Something is Rotten in Denmark

Oh Joy!  The Dallas Housewives are going on a trip where there will be nothing but fighting, and more fighting.  We just survived three awful episodes of RHOC, where their Jamaica trip was also mostly bitter fighting, which was exhausting, and painful to watch.
Will there be anything fun happening on this trip to Copenhagen?  Let us see! Continue reading

Goodbye Jamaica, Hello Unnecessary Surgery Land

housewives of orange county season 13 episode 16 vicki surgery
The Real Housewives of Orange County – Season 13, Episode 16, Twin Tweaks 

Jamaica rejoices, as the ladies are back in California. Vicki tells Steve she did not drink much, because her surgery is coming up.  We are shown receipts of Vicki drinking a lot in Jamaica.
Steve does not know what kind of surgery Vicki is even having, but we find out it will be a neck and face lift.  Ooh, surgery! Continue reading

New Housewife, Men, Babies, and No Moore Chateau Sheree

housewives of atlanta season 11 episode 1 nene gregg
The Real Housewives of Atlanta – Season 11, Episode 1, To Love and to Cherish

Are you ready for season 11?  We have a new Housewife, whose husband is musical royalty.  However, we lost two Housewives with the best lines, Sheree and Kenya!  I hope the new wife and new featured friend have gems falling from their mouths like Sheree and Kenya! Eva had a baby, and she, Cynthia, and Porsha have new men in their lives.
Let us see what this first episode has for us! Continue reading

I Understand You have Elephantiasis but Do Your Job

Below Deck Season 6

Below Deck – Season 6 Episode 5 – Naked Smoothies

Episode 5 of this season begins with the morning after hangovers.  The crew went out and celebrated a sweeeet tip and now the place is a mess.  Caroline says it’s a mind fuck to work with people who are nice to your face but mean behind your back.  She speaks the truth there.  Caroline needs to look less for people’s approval yet hearing Josiah shit talk her wasn’t cool.

Continue reading